Once Upon a Time

Funny how we start a fairy tale with once upon a time. This is not a fairy tale, but I definitely got to have my knight in shining armor. He never saw himself that way, and he might not have known that he saved me, but he did. He didn't see his incredible magic,  and I didn't always appreciate it, but it was always there. I can't tell you when I stopped believing, but it was early in my life. My life seemed to be challenging from the beginning, but I am strong. Ridiculously strong. I don't know where that comes from either, yet I have it. I identify with ants. It seems that I can endure the inconceivable and stand again, seemingly unscathed. Of course, I have incurred permanent reminders of the harshness of life and people, but I have somehow managed to thrive, like a flower growing through concrete. I count myself fortunate to have survived, and for my mighty spirit. I come from a very long line of badasses. 

When I met Joe, I had given up on ever having happily ever after. I was tired of people disappointing me. I was 23 years old and divorced and bitter. I was just done. Then I met Joe, and he was willing to renew my broken faith, everyday for nearly 21 years. He reminded me often that he was not going to leave, and he would be there, by my side, forever. Unfortunately, I needed constant reassurance. Perhaps, because so many had made promises that weren't kept. It's sad that some people are just here to remind us how awful they can be. But I got to share in the adventures of one of the good guys. And, yes, he should have gotten more time than he did, but I was there for almost half his life. He fought for us, and he would have done anything for our little family. He was the man who got all of his dreams. And I was most blessed to be able to fulfill some of those dreams, and to support him as he attained the rest. 

Sometimes one person, one day, one random sequence of events, can change everything. I wish you all magic, Ceeeej 
Joe on our wedding day. July 29,2000. With my bouquet 

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