Diary of a Mad Woman Gone Sane

Happy New Year! I apologize for being away so long. It has been quite a time. All is well here. I had emergency neck surgery. I'm recovering pretty well. It's slow going. I've had to do a lot of resting. I still can't lift a lot or overdo it too much. The headaches are gone, and the numbness in my fingers and toes is mostly gone. I'm feeling better every day. Going through another surgery without Joe was a challenge. He's been gone almost 9 years, and I still miss him every day. I grieve him while grieving all the time he's missed. We lost our Luna Jade in August to cancer, right after I had surgery. Thankfully I had someone to help me get her buried. She was my first dog I got out here. She was 3 weeks old when I got her. She was supposed to be drowned the day I got her, with all her siblings. I miss her so much!! I keep looking outside expecting to see her lying in the sun. I'd like to believe that she's with Kiwi dog and Flynn dog and Joe. I don...

For 49 years I have been a female human. I was just born this way. I'm not responsible for it. In that time I have been told how I am supposed to be. I have been told what I can and can't do. I have repeatedly been told to be a lady. Something I have never aimed to be. I've felt like I was bad at being a girl. I'm a good cook, but I hate to cook. I prefer baking to cooking. Maybe because it reminds me of my grandma. And it doesn't require constant attention. I am opinionated and intelligent and have a big voice. I'm no shrinking violet. Nor a wallflower. Nor a damsel in distress. I'm not demure. I can do the hair, the makeup, and the beautiful clothes, but I'm still me under all of that. I'm mighty inside of this smallish body. I used to feel like it was a cruel joke. People based their opinions on the outside of me, as many people do. I have been body shamed for being thin. Which has turned out to be a medical condition, strangely enough. I  have be...