Diary of a Mad Woman Gone Sane

As you may remember, I had Malinois puppies almost 8 months ago. I promised the female to my friend that has their Dad, and I tried to find homes for the two boys but I didn't. So I have decided to keep the two boys. They have been blessings to our little animal family. Their names are Lobo and Oso. Oso started life as Bear, but decided that he prefers to be called Oso. He's the largest of all 3 puppies. Lobo is the runt, and was born 28 hours after his brother and sister. When they were born he was half their size. He is now very close to the same size. At 7 months old, they are all around 70 pounds. Everyone is healthy and happy. Oso still struggles with listening and doing what he is told. Lobo is my sweetie, and is usually very close by. He is a much better listener than his brother, for the most part. Oso is very vocal, while Lobo is not unless there's actually something to bark at. We still get to see their sister about every week. We miss her, I miss her. She tries t...

Hello my fellow travelers. Once again life has swept me up in it. So many things are happening, good things. I have been sober for 26 months as of 2 days ago. I have been sober for approximately 1,138,900 minutes. One day at a time, sometimes one second at a time. And no cigarettes for 9 months. Life is really good, so my brain always looks for something to be awry. Joe has been gone 9 years as of March 20th. I'd love to say that I'm over it, but that would be a lie. And I'm ok with that. With as much as I love him, it would be unreasonable to assume that I will ever forget. Since becoming sober, I've changed so much. I'm no longer tolerating any bullshit, regardless of who it comes from. Which means I am losing people in my life. My boundaries are becoming firmer, and I believe someone when they show me who they are, the first time. I'm becoming less of a people pleaser, and thinking more about myself; and my own safety and recovery. For the first time, ever, I...

Happy New Year! I apologize for being away so long. It has been quite a time. All is well here. I had emergency neck surgery. I'm recovering pretty well. It's slow going. I've had to do a lot of resting. I still can't lift a lot or overdo it too much. The headaches are gone, and the numbness in my fingers and toes is mostly gone. I'm feeling better every day. Going through another surgery without Joe was a challenge. He's been gone almost 9 years, and I still miss him every day. I grieve him while grieving all the time he's missed. We lost our Luna Jade in August to cancer, right after I had surgery. Thankfully I had someone to help me get her buried. She was my first dog I got out here. She was 3 weeks old when I got her. She was supposed to be drowned the day I got her, with all her siblings. I miss her so much!! I keep looking outside expecting to see her lying in the sun. I'd like to believe that she's with Kiwi dog and Flynn dog and Joe. I don...